Hi,
A new render element is added at the end of the list, I don't think Corona controls that, it's Max thing.
When you add a new lightmix (CShading_LightSelect) layer, other layers should stay intact, unless you re-create the lightmix.
If you do this manually through render elements dialog, old values should stay intact. Just make sure that the light you add to a new lightmix layer is not in another layer (exception is, of course, the rest).