Sorry to hear you are having problems. I don't understand this part: "Secondly I cannot rename the CXR file extension to EXR from the render elements which I need for easy use in Photoshop. Because it will show the beauty render instead of the render element."
If you rename the main CXR to EXR, then ALL of the render elements will be in that, and all will show in Photoshop as layers so you can work with them as you like, which means rather than load several EXRs with just one layer, you can load the one EXR and get all the layers. OFC since Photoshop is terrible at working with EXRs, you do need the free EXR-IO plugin.