the problem about "realism" is photography is not real either. camera works a certain way and photoshopping the image afterwards - even if it just contrast, curve, slight lightroom touch-up - produces certain results. in the end it is some kind of "artistic" (hate the word though) tweaking, and yes, eyeballing :D
which is both good and bad. of course there are certain "styles" you can aim for - and also in photography these styles are produced by massive manipulation. staging, propping, lighting, gear used, photographer, post-production, print, art-direction, purpose, client (!!!)
but i understand the point too well. would be great to just prop a scene, materialize, light, hit f10 and real you are ;)
l