I'm sure you've done some research on fashion photography, here are some nice sources if you still are looking for inspiration:
https://www.inpholio.comhttps://www.gosee.deBoth are Germany-based but they feature many international agencies, brands and photographers.
You can search both for fashion related images and you'll get tons of results, I bet there'll be something similar to what you're after.
Don't overdo the background, simple clean stuff works better if you want to showcase the model. Clear lighting and framing. Right now, the framing focuses on the model, still you have some distraction going on in the foreground, the image has no free space to lead the eye, but that's what's needed for the model to stand out. Together with the muddy lighting it makes it feel quite uncomfortable in my opinion. You really need to direct the viewer to what you want to highlight.
Also, I'd strongly advice to get rid of any vignetting, that way you'll be forced to come up with a better composition. If you want a clean fashion look, a vignette is definitely not helping.
I don't know what your final model looks like but honestly it's all about the pose, expression and the 'moment' as a photographer would probably put it. Most of the time they don't look for the perfect image but for something that makes the image interesting... And that's what is really hard to capture in CG since we tailor everything to a specific need and level of perfection and there's no room for something random and interesting - but that's what you need to make it interesting to a viewer.
And then - don't expect it to be done in the VFB only. No shoot in this world goes directly from camera to print/web, there's really a lot of post production, sometimes even on the most trivial stuff. What you see in the VFB can only be a start, make sure to play in post production to learn what looks good and why it helps the image.